2007-2008 Calvine High School Blog

7 responses so far ↓

• 1    Tj P. // Oct 25, 2007 at 1:44 pm

  Life Is Sometimes a Struggle in Itself

  My mom, I A P, is a warrior at heart. She has overcome her old life to form a better one. In this essay you will see some of the choices, moves, and actions my mom has taken to win this big game we call life.

  My mom left her home at age 17. She couldn’t stand her mom and brother, so she moved to a different apartment conveniently in the same complex, Diamondhead Apartments in Olympia, WA. She graduated from high school and went to college for two years I think, but school never was her thing. She was very smart though. Her father was an alcoholic and always made my mom clean up the broken glass after he would get drunk and break things. So when my mom was 21, she moved to California to start her new life.

  I personally think that it was the best choice she ever made, moving to California. Here, she got a job with Apple and worked for them for 14 some odd years. MCI System House took her job, and then EDS bought MCI. So up until recently she has been working for the same company since she moved here. Her brother, my Uncle Eddie, is an alcoholic as well, and needless to say, still lives with their mom. My father, TG, who my mom met in Washington as a teenager, is now a drug addict even after two years in Washington State Prison. My mom’s dad is now dead from committing suicide. So I think for my mom leaving all that behind and starting over is exactly what she needed.

  After moving to California, my mom met her next husband. Actually it was her only husband, she never married my dad. So she married my other dad, Kevin Penoyer. He was fine but never treated me like he treated my brother. He is not my biological father, so I guess it made it weird for him or something. So after I told my mom, they started fighting and never stopped. Before I was ten they were divorced, and we could only see him once every two weeks. I remember listening to them yell and argue with each other all the time. He was never really good to her. She told me that, “it seemed like she found all the assholes.” And I didn’t really disagree. I feel horrible because it’s true. She is an extremely good person and she can’t seem to find a decent guy.

  While we are on this guy subject, another reason she came to California was for a guy name Ronnie. He was a good guy she says, and he always treated her right. Two months after she moved here, Ronnie fell out of a window to his death. So after my dad Kevin, she has married us, her two sons. She told me the other day, “Do you see any wedding ring on this finger? I have a ring with my two kids’ birthstones in it!”

  So my mom’s whole life has been her obstacle to overcome. She doesn’t need anybody besides my brother and me. I am extremely proud of my mom for overcoming all the problems and speed bumps in her life, witch tried to stop her from getting where she is today.

• 2    Tirzah T. // Oct 25, 2007 at 2:58 pm

  Overcoming Obstacles

  Everybody has to overcome obstacles in their life. Some have to do it alone, while others have support. In my obstacle, I had the support of family and close friends. I wasn’t alone at all. My obstacle wasn’t only mine. It was an obstacle for my family, and our close friends as well. When I was only ten years old, I lost two people very close to me. I considered B and A both as cousins to me. Our families were very close. When they both passed away, it was a trial and obstacle for my whole family. Their death occurred within a week of each other. I will never forget those four days. These two deaths and two funerals have impacted my life forever.

  BTK was just shy of his 18th birthday and graduating high school. I had stayed home from school one day, probably faking sick. The phone rang, and I wasn’t supposed to answer it, but I did anyways. The girl on the other end of the phone asked for Aunt M. I don’t remember anyone ever calling my mom that I told her she was at work and asked for a message. She told me her name was K and she was Dd and B’s daughter. There had been a family emergency, and asked that my mom call her back as soon as possible. When my mom got home from work, I told her about the phone call and asked about my “cousin,” K. I didn’t even know Dd and B had a daughter. She said she would explain later and went into the other room. About half an hour later, she came back out and told me what the emergency was. My “cousin” had been in a car accident. He was killed on impact. My mom was having a fit thinking about who she needed to call first. She chose my dad. He came home right away and called my aunt to find out what happened. The unofficial story was that he had committed suicide.

  On January 28, 2001, he was on the bus home from a football game. When they arrived at the school, he immediately got in his car and sped off in the pouring rain. Some close friends said that on the bus, his girlfriend had been flirting with other guys on the team and completely ignoring him. They also said that he was in love and talked about marrying her after high school. He was supposed to give a teammate a ride home, but had told him to find someone else. He didn’t turn on a corner he’s taken everyday of his life as he was going eighty miles an hour in the pouring rain. His car was found about fifteen minutes after he left the school. The paramedics said he was killed on impact and suffered no pain. Even if they could have gotten him out of the car, there would have been no chance for survival. The hood was pushed up in the windshield and the whole car was wrapped around a telephone pole. He never made it home that night.

  JAP was born with one lung unattached, and the other filled with fluid. After years of what the doctors thought was serious asthma, A became extremely ill. There were some complications during some tests they were taking, and they discovered that he had pneumonia in his functioning lung. He was flown from Sacramento to San Francisco by helicopter. After a day and night of keeping him stabilized, and bringing him back after losing him over and over again, S and J, his parents, decided they had to let him go. There was no guess as to how long they could keep reviving him. My brother and his girlfriend had gone to San Francisco with them to help with their younger son and to lend moral support to their friends. Back at home, we were just waiting with no news and no idea of what was going on. On February 3, 2001 (the next day) my brother and his then girlfriend, (now his wife), came home about four in the afternoon. I was the first to see them walk around the corner. Her face was red and her eyes were bloodshot from crying. His head was hung down and he was covering his face with his shaking hands. I ran into the laundry room and slammed the door. I climbed on the shelf and sat there for what seemed like hours, when in reality was only a few minutes. When I finally came out, my brother grabbed me and held me close and tight and said, “I’m sorry. There was nothing more the doctors could do.” Later they explained to us that the doctors weren’t ever aware that A only had one lung. After the autopsy, they discovered multiple problems with his tiny, frail body. Also, they explained that people in his condition usually only lived to be a few months old, whereas A lived to be almost four years old, and we should be grateful that we had him around that long. I don’t remember anything else that day except cuddling up to my big brother for the first time since I was a toddler, and crying myself to sleep.

  B’s funeral was the day after we heard news of A. We all piled into the van, and drove two hours to Redding. We arrived at the church for the funeral and didn’t see Dd and B until we walked into the family area. My whole family was there, including some I’ve never met before. When we walked in, B, Dd, K, K, S, L and J were standing at the door greeting everyone. My dad hugged my aunt longer than I’ve seen him hug anyone other than my mom or his mom. We hugged, and cried, and took our seats. After about twenty minutes, we followed the casket into the chapel. When I walked in, I looked around and couldn’t believe how many people were seated in there. There were hundreds of people there. Friends, family, the entire football team, and more than half of the school’s student body and staff were in attendance. B had enlisted in the Marines, and was scheduled to start training after high school. He was honored with a five-gun salute and a flag-covered casket. The services were very emotional. As we headed to the gravesite it started raining and I think that topped off the whole day’s emotions. We went back to the church for a luncheon with the family, and then headed to my aunt and uncle’s house. We passed the phone pole that B had run into. I couldn’t hold back my tears when I saw the flowers, wreaths, ribbons, banners, and other memorials practically covering the pole. At their house, we all talked and caught up. I found out the reason I didn’t know K, was because the last time I saw her was when I was about two or three years old, which was almost eight years earlier. After a few hours of that, it was time for us to head home. We said our goodbyes, and got on the road.

  A few days later, A’s funeral had come. Again, we walked into the room for all the family, and accompanied the casket into the chapel. I thought I had cried myself out that week, but I was wrong. Everything was so emotional. There was a picture of A, taken only a few months earlier, placed on the casket. I cried so much and so hard that I started to breath too fast and had to be taken out of the chapel by one of my brothers. I can’t remember anything after that.

  Now, almost seven years later, we still talk about B and A often. It’s not a touchy subject. Their parents would rather talk about them with a little grief, than to have them forgotten. S and J have had two other children since then, and they don’t miss an opportunity to tell them about their brother, A. They have a wall in their house dedicated to him. Also, we go visit him often. He is buried at a cemetery about a block from our houses. As for Dd and B, they go see B’s grave often. We see them when we can, but not as much as we’d like, considering their quite a distance away. We haven’t forgotten B and A, but we have moved on with our lives.

  I chose to write about these two obstacles, not because I was defeated by them, but because I faced this obstacle at such a young age and I had the support I needed to get through it. These obstacles have impacted my life immensely. I will be forever changed. Two boys, practically cousins to me, left this world at such a young age. Both were doing nothing but good and lifting the spirits of those around them. I believe I defeated this obstacle, because I later decided I wanted to live my life as B and A did. I would never pass up and opportunity to do something nice for someone without expecting anything in return. I would never let someone get the best of me. And I will always follow my heart, and live like there’s no tomorrow.

• 3    Wa M // Oct 29, 2007 at 9:32 am

  Overcoming an Obstacle

  Ever feel like giving up because of so much failure? Athletes usually feel like a failure when they have fallen behind in a sports or game. Movie stars start getting irritated when they can’t get everything done within a few takes or so. With students they go through the same level of emotion state whether a sport or school is in general. To tell you, I for example have failed many times, but I keep on getting up and keep pushing myself to try to be successful in school.

  My grades started dropping in the 4th grade. Math and English became a struggle and started getting harder. I couldn’t keep up, so I started going after school for tutor. I gave up recess to study to try not to fall behind, and then homework started piling up because of lots of pressure. I didn’t have much fun after that point, and my self-esteem was low. In 7th grade I wanted to start fresh like everyone, try to be top of class, and joined basketball and track. Then grades started dropping, and I failed all of my classes. Like 4th grade, I started to go to tutors before and after school. In 9th grade I started hating school, because I knew it was going to be hard. Even though is a fresh start, I knew my ability and talents weren’t as good as the average people on campus. I didn’t care if it was fresh or not because I barely made 9th grade, and only by a thin hair. Classes were easy till the system started of homework kept coming and classes got confusing. I started ditching school because I couldn’t get a good grade even when I tried, I felt like I was just wasting my time trying to do something that I couldn’t do. So I was a failure in grades and academics my whole life. But to this day I’m still in school because I have learned that no matter how hard an obstacle is, only I can break the limits and my uncle from the Marine Core taught me that there’s a quote he used in boot camp and it was “test yourself everyday, otherwise it is a wasted day.” To this day I use that as my motivation.

  In elementary school, I had crowds of friends who I always hung out with and always had fun. My friends and I loved playing soccer, because I always had so much fun. Running was something I was always good at, and I didn’t let my size bring me down. Though my friends were tall and fast, I always tried to be faster and quicker. As it came to the 7th grade, I knew what I wanted to do in sports and what to play. Track and basketball were my strong points because I have high endurance, and I was real swift. But as I joined the teams for school my friends started changing and I started losing friends instead of gaining friends. Due to sports and activities my friends and I never really got too hung out like we did in elementary. So I dropped my sports to join my friends but I felt a connection that I didn’t belong in that crowd no more because the atmosphere changed; from there on my self esteem just dropped and my morale was gone. As my grades dropped, lost friends and not into sports much anymore I started changing my style from hardworking to lazy and from challenging routes to simple routes. Finally, getting into high school I was happy and upset, I had no friends what so ever but that wasn’t it, I was dragged or pushed myself into the wrong crowd just so I have people to talk to, before school, after school, lunch, and on weekends. I hated the crowd they always did stupid and random stuff for example, they always littered in the senior lawn that the class of ’04 made, and they never listened, I knew that wasn’t me because my way was listen to the staff and elders they always have a reason for saying something, but I guess not when I was in the wrong crowd and to join them I will do stupid things too.

  In my sophomore year when I moved to Sacramento, California I joined a club called ROTC. It was requested by my uncle so I did it for him because he helps me and so much ways so I took his word for it, and before I knew it, the crowd I was in had high standards, good grades, looked sharp, was outstanding, and everyone within that crowd and unit had there own talents and leadership skills to share. I was just so amazed that I changed back to my old self and challenged myself and pushed myself to the limit and do things I didn’t get to do before. For example, how many people get to ride in an aircraft carrier with 20 or so friends from San Diego to San Francisco? I got to take pictures with the Blue Angel officers and shake hands with them. To me is a special and honorable memory and to this day I thank my uncle for opening up my door and showing me that there is hope still to be successful.

  Every kid always had a role model whether a policeman, fireman, or a soldier. For me my career was always in what my relatives did. My uncle is a great guy who loves to teach me right from wrong. When I was about 6, my uncle got me into vehicles learning basics, it was fun and I loved getting oily, dirty and rolling the tires around. From 6 to age 13, I got really into cars. Then school grade were dropping and I thought and said “How am I suppose to do what I like to do without an education.” As a freshman we are suppose to start planning on what we want to do after high school. I thought and thought and I figured out after research that the military had mechanics as a job the only thing is that you had to pass a test called the ASVAB. At junior year you are suppose to be in track with your career. But as I looked at it my grades they were low and my school wasn’t going well with academics. So I gave up that career life. Now as a senior I realize that the things I’m good at is when I’m being challenged and the military is really good at that so I am working now on getting into the Naval Academy in Annapolis or the army academy in West Point.

  In conclusion, getting up and keep pushing me to be successful in school is what I am doing now, Because, I know now that education and school is the key to success. Everyone can reach there goals and overcome any obstacle if they push themselves to the limit. So when push comes to shove don’t try, do it. Do everything you need to do, and it will become easy, is so easy a caveman can do it!

• 4    Steven N // Oct 30, 2007 at 3:06 pm

  Obstacle Essay

  If you think your life is hard, then you know nothing at all. Everyone has issues, and they think they are the only ones, but they don’t know that they are not alone. I’m here to tell you that my life was one disaster after another. I have never complained once.

  Before, during, and after, I had trouble in elementary school. At the age of four, my mother accidentally hit me with her car. It was a beautiful morning, I was told to get the mail, and my mother was in the garage starting the car. She called for me, and without realizing it she left the car in neutral. I was outside of the house on my way to the mailbox when my mother bumped the front of the car which came barreling at me. The car hit me. I bled like a water fountain. On the same day, I was in the hospital, and the next thing I knew, I was in my aunt’s house only to realize that it was a year later. Five years later, after the incident I’ve been hit by six different cars. When I walk to some place, there is always a car going out of control. Those cars always seem to come at me and no one else. Out of a total of how many times I’ve been hit by cars, it would be a total of six different cars. I remember one time when I was on my way to the store when a car suddenly came out of nowhere and rammed me over. It is a miracle that I’m still here today. Every grade in elementary school I’ve been in, I seem to always fail. I don’t know why I always fail, but for some reason I can’t concentrate when it comes to taking a test or a quiz. I try my best in school and everything. I just thought that I might have ADD. Everything changed when I went to middle school; I didn’t even think that I was going to make it to middle school.

  Before, during, and after, I always seemed to have trouble in and out of middle school. At the age of thirteen, I was diagnosed with Appendicitis. I woke up one morning feeling a slight pain in the lower right section of my stomach. At lunch, the pain started to worsen so that I had to go to the office, I had to be sent home on that day. On the same day, I went to the hospital and the doctor told me that I had appendicitis. The pain got even worse so the doctor had to put me under heavy doses of anesthesia. I was under the painkiller for at least ten hours; I also had to stay at the hospital for three weeks before I could get released. I also had staples put in the area that the doctor cut open. For the rest of the seventh and part of the eighth grade, I was a failure in middle school. The reason I was a failure in school was that I got into so many fights and started to ditch school. I also made too many bad friends and many messed up mistakes that I now regret. That was probably the reason I failed the seventh grade. The only thing that stopped me from hanging out with my bad friends was that I was switched from James Rutter Middle School to Joseph Middle School. In the middle of the eighth grade, I moved and left all my friends behind (if I had any). When I moved, I thought it was easy making friends, but it seemed a lot harder than I thought. I had no friends and I was always alone wandering the school at lunch. I even was teased for being alone all the time. The students even called me a loner. I was teased so much that I couldn’t handle it anymore. I even thought of suicide was my only option if things didn’t change for me. It all changed when I failed all my classes and went to summer school. That’s where I met my loyal friends of today. These people were my friends, and I knew who to hang out with in high school. The suicide thought was only way to deal with my problem. I haven’t tried to kill myself so don’t worry. Everything changed when I went to Elk Grove High School.

  Before and during, I had trouble in high school. I was a failure in school as a freshman, sophomore, and a junior. I didn’t know why, but I couldn’t concentrate in class. Every time the teacher talks, I always fall asleep. When it’s time to take the tests and the quizzes, I know nothing on the paper. This happened for all three years, and even though I have trouble with school I never have trouble with friends. I switched to Calvine High School. The reason I switched schools was because for me, Elk Grove was hard. I miss my friends so much, but Calvine is a great place to attend because I get my work done. Calvine is also a great place because there are no “clicks” and there are rarely any fights. The teachers at Calvine are also nice enough to comment on what I did. My family got evicted from our home by the government. The reason we got from evicted from our house was because my step-father got convicted on assault. The people he assaulted were my mother and I when I was eight. It is hard to find a place to live when you’ve been living in the same place for five years. Now I’ve been living with grandmother, which was better than I thought. Now my life has meaning to continue because I have great friends and something I love to do which is cooking.

  Just to let anyone know this isn’t actually my whole story of obstacles in my life. The obstacles in my life are too hard to tell today but someday I wish to tell everyone about my life. If you still think your life is hard then you really know nothing. To everyone who thinks their lives are worse, stop and understand that somewhere or someplace, there is someone who a much harder time than you.

• 5    Seleya G // Nov 1, 2007 at 8:46 am

  Seleya G
  Going Through

  In this world people go through things, some good some bad. But the memories stay with you. No matter how old you get, they will be there. The something people go through can change the way they think, feel and act. I know this because of what I had to go through.

  My family was kicked out of the closest thing to a home we ever had. My mom, my little brother JR and I moved in with my oldest brother E. Before that we lived any and everywhere we could: With friends, in homeless shelters, and even on the street. I was happy to be living somewhere I knew I was safe, so I thought. I didn’t know how bad E had gotten into drugs. People were running in and out of the small apartment at all hours of the day and night. He began beating my mom up for money. There was nothing we could do to stop him. We lived in a small one bedroom apartment so JR and I slept in the living room right by the front door. I was so afraid that something was going to happen that I didn’t sleep and didn’t want to go to school. Plus kids would make fun of me because I didn’t always smell good or look good; I didn’t want to be there.

  Everyone in the apartment knew what was going on, but no one seemed to care. I lived in the middle of the apartments it was called B building. So I knew just about everyone that lived there. I knew all the stories, why they were there, and why they were leaving. The ‘who didn’t like who’ game. I knew it all. Some people I could go see, and the people who were up to no good. One day I was in the living room watching TV when I had a funny feeling that something was going to happen. My brother C came to see us after being in the army for about five years. I thought that he had come back for JR and me. He told me that he was going to take us with him. But my mom didn’t like that idea, neither did E. C had been there for a week before E went crazy and started throwing C’s stuff out of the apartment. It was the first time I saw C do nothing back. He just sat there like nothing was going on. Then when it was done C pickup his stuff and put it in his car.

  The night after I had all that I was going to take and called the police. My friend S and I were walking home from her house when I heard a thunk on the front door. Then JR screamed out with pain. I didn’t care to see what happen. All I knew was that E had done something to my little brother and he wasn’t getting away with it. So I ran back to S’s house and called the police. When they came my mom and E were so mad at me that they said that it would be my fault we went in to foster care, that I was stupid and some other words that aren’t so school appropriate. The week after at school JR and I were put in to foster homes.

  It was the first time JR and I had ever been separated. It scared me. I had always looked out for him, and now that I couldn’t, it made me feel that what ever happened to him was on me. JR stayed at the receiving home. Another girl named JA and I went to live with one other girl named Sh. She had been in the home for 2 years before we came. The parents were Jd and Jry. Jd was a school teacher, and Jry worked in Fresno. Sh was their favorite. She could do no wrong. As for JA and I, well, they made fun of her because she was black and me well I was ugly, fat, and stupid. I lived with them for three years before given the opportunity to live with my brother again, so I left. I had missed JR so much. But because we had been away for so long and so much happened to him, I couldn’t stand being around him. I was so mad at myself that I ended up taking it out on JR.

  JR got into some trouble with the new foster parents and was kicked out of the home and moved in with our dad. At the time I didn’t think that my dad had changed from an evil drug dealer to a sweet loving daddy. So I stayed with the forester parents. That soon became my family, and still to this day is my family. I consider them my grandparents.
  I have become so close to my new family that you might as well say I was born in to it. But it’s not over, I still worry about my mom who no matter how much she lied, never got my brother and I back. She still lives with E, both are on drugs. I have always loved my mom I always will, but I can’t see or talk to her until she stops, until she can say that JR and I mean more to her then the thing’s she puts in her system. Although I thought that God wasn’t there, he was. Because I know had I stayed with my mom, I wouldn’t be here to write this. I would be just like my mom or dead.

  I knew that God make no mistake, so that lets me know I’m here for a reason. There is no way that any one can tell me different. I’m now doing what I need to do to make sure I never see my kids go through that. I not mad at what I had to go through. Looking back now, I see what I would have to give up, I’m sure I’m better off here. With a boyfriend and a family that loves me for me, I’m happy to be here where I’m in life.

  I made it through! If there is one thing I could teach you is that everyone can change if they want to so don’t hold what they did over their heads. The more things you go through the stronger you become.

• 6    Rhonda F // Nov 1, 2007 at 11:07 am

  These essays give me a great deal of hope for the future when I see how our students have dealt with very overwhelming obstacles and won out over them. Thank you to each one of you who has bravely shared your stories on this Blog. It is my hope that many others will read your stories and be inspired to work even harder at overcoming their own obstacles. Please keep writing your stories. Each of you has a great deal of writing talent that should continue to grow.

• 7    Angeli M // Dec 5, 2007 at 11:01 pm

  Reality Nightmare

  Sitting alone in the dark crying to myself. Holding my hands and praying to God for help. Happiness was all I craved for. I lost contact with many of my friends and didn’t care about myself anymore. My interest changed from time to time and my mood was different every other hour. I confused myself and many other people. Depression was the hardest thing to overcome for me.

  I was 15 when it all started. First off, Davie was his name. He made me believe I was nothing. I though that life without him would be a disaster. Then this man brainwashed me a little bit at a time as we hung out more. All I wanted to do was spend all my time with him. I didn’t care if I had to give up everything or not. At the end he ended what we had a couple months later. I cried for days and days. I tired to do whatever I could to forget the problem, but I made it worse. This was when the depression came in.

  Help was all that I needed. The first thing was that my mother saw the changes and found out that I was suffering depression. I stopped going out of town with my mother and stopped talking to her. Sometimes when she comes home, she sees me crying in the kitchen sitting by the dinner table. Then a couple weeks later, my mother signed me up for therapy. Cynthia was my therapist name. She was more like a friend and not a therapist. Things seemed to still be the same, but I slowly overcame the problem as time past by. Years later she had to move out of town because her husband had to transfer location for his job. It was sad that she had to go, but I understood everything. It was good while it lasted because she has helped me a lot. After two years of my treatment, it helped me become a better person.

  When I stopped going to therapy, a court case started between Davie and me. The first person to come visit me was officer Mike M and second was detective Jim H. I gave then all the details they wanted. I also answered all their questions and helped them as much as I can. Six months past and the case was still going on. I had to answer more and more questions. I also had many letters coming to my house. Now he is behind bars and serving 5 years of probation. They finally got the truth out of him. He also has a restraining order from me till 2011. I feel much more safer since he got taken away.
  Now days, life seem much better. The first thing I noticed was that I felt much more happy. I’m not upset with myself anymore. My choices seem to make me feel good about myself. Things with my family are becoming better. Also, I’m growing stronger and moving on with my life. I don’t cry about what has happened to me. I learned to let go now because it is the past and I shouldn’t hold on to it. Most importantly, I have a great man in my life. I plan to stay with him for more years. Then I hope that when time is right, I get to spend my future with him. I feel as if God has answered my prayers. Life couldn’t be any better then it is now.

  Life is full of many mistakes to learn from. Most of them are to be fixed or to overcome it. What most people don’t realize is that it’s not easy to overcome some things. I takes longer then expected. I overcame depression, what did you overcome?

Leave a Comment